Selfish Love

Not that I miss you and wish you were here
I miss the person you once were
The time when you said you've waited
And didn't mind waiting until I say yes

Not that I'm saying I wish you didn't change
Because I have learned that at times I have to be content
And that I need to change

But I know me and I know you
I know I have my lows and so do you
How do we compromise
That time I wish I knew
And there is no secret I was still stuck to you

Until you made the call and left
Until I realised you couldn't wait anymore
Until I learned that love is not selfish
But the one who love and longed to be loved is

But you're a memory that keeps me up some nights
That reminds me of unresolved conflicts that they talked about
A memory that gives me clarity of thought
A memory that is common to a woman

A woman who deserves love and understanding
Not rules and regulations
A woman who deserves romance and warmth
Not terms and conditions
A woman who believes that she deserves to be herself

-PRK-

A Paradigm Shift Perhaps

After the storm and unavoidable turbulences
I wanted to sit quietly and enjoy my own company
Or perhaps sit in a tree and watch the world go by
But I too wanted to sleep under the stars with you
Live today, talk about the world
And have a quiet time next to you
Find that balance that we both are looking for
And memorise poems that we can relate to
I want to listen to my own heartbeat
And love without fear
Forgive and forget, and find clarity of thought
Here, as I walk this earth with you
A paradigm shift perhaps, when I finally meet you

-PRK-

Beholden, Need Not

I don't want to own you
A jaywalker, and if you're the fence, I just want to walk pass you
See you every day for a little while as I walk down the street
Sweeping you off my feet maybe; with my cuffs, if you're the ground that is
Maybe water you in the morning on my way to work if you're the flowerbed

I don't want to hang on to you
A bird, and you're a tree, I just want to drop by and perch for a while when it's too hot
Or when it rains, you'll be my shelter
Or maybe I'll lay down on your dried leaves on the ground if I'm being me
I'll pick a book and have a read

I don't want to cling to you
But if I'm a photographer I wouldn't mind a suspicious dollar bill to take your photos
Capturing your smile, your goofy self and your gaze
Even if you feel uncomfortable, not being yourself in the morning, I'll make you pose for fun
And bribe you for breakfast!

I won't try to possess you, convince you
But I'll fight you, make you say what you want to say
Make you say what you mean and mean what you say
I'll cut you till you bleed to make you feel alive
Make you realise that I'll be there if you need me around

Because we met to meet, met to love, met to care
Not necessarily to be with each other, be in love, be in each other's care
Because love is a mystery, love is poetic, love is an interesting phenomenon
Something that wanders in our imagination
An illumination in the darkness

And I won't have you beholden to me
Unless you want to
Unless you want me to
Unless the canvas of your life needs colour
Unless you want me around forever

-PRK-

Love Seat

Never meant to make you wend
Never meant to make you misspend
I intended to represent
The actual mistrust I've underwent

As the illusions I've apprehended
Had me reoffended the warmth they recommended
Delusional and consumable, I then pretended
That every piece are unamended

For such passion is inevitable
My confessions are dimensional
Of which each of them will be skeptical
To those who are prophetical

So relinquish that desire
Of which you will soon misfire
For I'm one you will encipher
For the waiting is now kitschier